Honey Boo Boo Review

This has got to be one of the most shocking reality shows I've witnessed.  TLC, you've outdone yourselves.  But I really think that the show should be named "Here Comes Mama Bear"  because we all know she's the star.....

So from the mouths of the reality stars themselves, I give you the highlights of this weeks show.....

Mama Bear quotes:

"Pageants are not a cheap sport."

"Doesn't take a rocket scientist to coupon"

"When the apocalypse hits at the end of the year, I could sell that roll of toilet paper we got for free for freakin' $500!"-mama

"What's the apocalypse?"- chubbs

"When the zombies attack!" -mama

"I wouldn't say I let myself go, I just look good when I wanna look good"  (insert cackle and air kiss)

"I ain't no barbie doll.  But I ain't the ugliest person in the world.  Trust me.  I have seen some jacked up people!"

"As you can tell, I got some of my vajiggle jaggle cleaned up."

Honey Boo Boo quotes:

 I hope mama don't eat glitzy.  She eats everything else" (glitzy is her pet miniature pig)

"Elvis is Santa Claus' helper.  He helps Santa make toys.  I know this cause my daddy told me."

"Mama got fork lift feet!"  

"I love smages"  (massages)

Under Paid Salon Worker, who wishes she'd called in sick quote:  
(yes- they went to a salon.  Poor salon workers!)

"When the family first came in, it was very, very overwhelming.  And their personalities, big, very big!"

"I have not heard of a "fork lift foot" before.  That was a first."

"It was a good experience.  Well.... it was an experience.  I think I need to go home now."  -salon worker.  

Poor, poor salon worker.

Sugar bear gets no respect:

Sugar bear (Honey Boo Boo's dad) bought mama a bronze statue of a deer for their 8 yr anniversary.  Mama wasn't thrilled but he said it reminded them of all the road kill that they've collected, cleaned and bbq'd  on the weekends.  Then he lovingly pets the bronze deer.  Hmm.  I'll let you figure that one out.

Lessons I've learned watching this show:

-I'm paying too much for toilet paper.

-Apparantly Elvis was shorter than we thought.

-The bible forgot to mention zombies when it talks about the apocalypse.

-Maybe I should show my 10 yr old what salon workers REALLY do before she decides to go to beauty school.

-I'm never EVER complaining about my dinner & movie date nights or anniversary gifts.  Because, it's not a buffet dinner and a bronze deer replica of road kill.  (Cue the romance.)